Polyamorous or Consensually / Ethically Non-monogamous Relationship Therapy

Polyamory and non-monogamy take many forms, each unique to the people involved. Your relationship deserves to be recognised and supported in a way that works for you. While all relationships require communication, trust, and care, non-monogamous relationships can come with additional aspects that may need attention and discussion.

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Metamours

The people you are in a direct romantic relationship with are called paramours. Their other partners—those you may not be directly involved with—are called metamours. There’s no guarantee that you and your metamours will always get along, or you may have different expectations about how these relationships should function, which can impact your dynamic. Your relationship with your metamours is just as important as your romantic or sexual relationships, and therapy can provide a space to strengthen these connections, work through challenges, or set healthy boundaries.

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Breakups in a Polycule

A breakup within a polycule can feel complex, sometimes affecting other relationships in unexpected ways. You may need to navigate whether you’ll remain friendly or if you’ll still be part of the same social or relationship circles. How do you process your emotions while maintaining your other relationships? What support do you need at this time? Therapy can help you move through this transition while considering the needs of both yourself and those still within your network.

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Jealousy

Jealousy is a normal human emotion, even in polyamorous relationships. A healthy poly relationship isn't about eliminating jealousy but recognising and safely expressing those feelings. Expecting that jealousy won’t exist can lead to difficulties if you suppress or deny your emotions, thinking you're "doing it wrong." Therapy can help explore these feelings, identify their root causes, and develop tools to manage them constructively.

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Opening Up a Relationship

How do you start the conversation about opening up your relationship? One of the biggest misconceptions is that asking the question itself is a form of betrayal—it's not. It’s a valid and important discussion that may take time to explore. Non-monogamy isn’t for everyone, and some people will always be monogamous. Therapy offers a safe, neutral space to explore the idea openly, ensuring that both partners feel heard, respected, and able to make an informed decision together.

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Boundaries

Establishing boundaries is crucial in open relationships. It’s important to discuss what is and isn’t comfortable for each person, but this can sometimes be challenging. You might worry about placing restrictions on someone else’s choices, but at the same time, you need to feel emotionally safe. Are there certain people or activities that need to be discussed beforehand? What agreements help maintain trust and well-being for everyone involved? Therapy can help navigate these conversations and create boundaries that feel fair and healthy for all partners.

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Why Non-Monogamy?

What has led you to explore non-monogamy? Are you curious about new possibilities? Do you feel like something is missing in your current dynamic? Have you developed feelings for someone else and want to understand what that means? Or are you and your partner looking to bring someone new into your existing relationship? Whatever your reason, therapy provides a space to reflect on your motivations, address concerns, and ensure that all partners are approaching non-monogamy in a way that aligns with their values and emotional needs.

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